Learning to Appreciate Uncertainty with Fibromyalgia

Learning to Appreciate Uncertainty with Fibromyalgia
OK, I admit it: I'm a fixer. When I was a child, my mother labeled my behavior as the inability to "leave well enough alone." But it's a bit deeper than that. When I see something isn't right, I feel the need to do something about it. Sounds admirable, doesn't it? It's not. After all, who am I to say that something is not right? I guess it's a matter of faith; I'm never sure that things will work out unless I intervene. And so I do. I cause myself to feel responsible for all kinds of things that really have nothing to do with me. Talk about self-importance! It's exhausting. And it contributes greatly to my fibromyalgia fatigue. The problem with being a fixer is that I've missed out on all the other possibilities that exist in the world. Forcing my solutions on a situation eliminates uncertainty, sure. I know it will get done because I'm the one who does it. But is that a good thing? I've begun to believe it is not, for I perform every task in my unique manner and to my unique standards — the same way, every time. Where's the opportunity for growth or creativity in that? I've been considering the times I've been unable to keep a commitment because of my physical symptoms. At those times someone else stepped in to perform the task, the task was postponed, or it remained undone. In no case did the world stop spinning. For years, I've beaten myself up when unable to fulfill obligations. What I've failed to understand is that my "inability" has been the opportunity for creativity that otherwise would not have existed. Now I realize that these opportunities are the magic of life. And the stronger I believe this, the more freedom I experience. Instead of feeling bad about the way a situation unfolded because of my absence, I've begun to see the beauty in
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  1. Lisa Radelet says:

    Thank you for this perspective. There’s so much wisdom in this approach and it’s so beautifully said. It really gave me something to think about.

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